Dad Jokes
Short setup, punchy punchline, maximum groan. Tap the card for the drumroll, tap again for the next one.
Why did the car take a nap?
It was tired! π
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63 jokes in the jar
See all 63 at once
- Why did the car take a nap? It was tired! π
- What do cats eat for breakfast? Mice Krispies! π±
- Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide! π
- What do you call a cold puppy? A chili dog! πΆ
- What do horses do when it's time for bed? Hit the hay! π΄
- Why are libraries so tall? Because they have many stories! π
- How do bees get to school? On the school buzz! π
- What did the duck say to the waiter when he brought the check? Put it on my bill! π¦
- Why did the spider go to school? He wanted to be a web designer! π·οΈ
- What do you call a fly without wings? A walk! πͺ°
- What do you call an illegally parked frog? Toad! πΈ
- Why did the cake cross the road? It saw a fork up ahead! π
- What do you call a boomerang that won't come back? A stick! πͺ
- What did the beach say when the tide came in? Long time no sea! π
- Why don't astronauts like gravity? It brings them down! π
- What did the buffalo say to her son on the first day of school? Bison! π¦¬
- How do fish pay for groceries? With sand dollars! π
- What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory! π
- Why did an old man fall in a well? Because he couldn't see that well! π΄
- What do you call a fish with no eye? A fsh! π
- How do you cure a fear of a speed bump? You slowly get over it! π
- What do you get when you cross a fish with an elephant? Swimming trunks! π
- Why are frogs good at baseball? They know how to catch fly balls! πΈ
- What's the easiest building to lift? A lighthouse! π
- Did you hear about the circus fire? It was in tents! πͺ
- Where do fingers grow? On palm trees! π΄
- What did one eye say to the other? Between us, something smells! π
- Why did the Energizer Bunny go to jail? He was charged with battery! π°
- What did the pirate say on his birthday? Aye, matey! π΄ββ οΈ
- Why did the guy get fired from the calendar factory? He took a day off! π
- Did you hear about the girl who ate a frog? They say she's going to croak! πΈ
- What's the best thing about living in Switzerland? I don't know, but the flag is a big plus! π¨π
- When does a regular joke become a dad joke? When it becomes apparent! π
- Two fish are in a tank. One turns to the other and says... Any idea how to drive this thing? π
- I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something! πͺ
- What did the three-legged dog say when he walked into a saloon? I'm looking for the man who shot my paw! π
- Why are peppers the best at archery? Because they habanero! πΆοΈ
- My dog is a genius. I asked him, 'What's two minus two?' He said nothing. π
- Did you hear about the satellite dish that got married? The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible! π‘
- What did the Lego brick say to its friend? I'm stuck on you! π§±
- Why did the Lego figure go to the doctor? He was feeling a little blocked! π§±
- What do you call a sleeping Lego dinosaur? A dino-snore! π¦
- Why couldn't the Lego pirate play cards? He was sitting on the deck! π΄ββ οΈ
- Why doesn't Spider-Man use a computer? Because he's afraid of getting caught on the web! π·οΈ
- What does Spider-Man do when he's sleepy? He takes a web nap! πΈοΈ
- Why is Spider-Man so good at school? He always aces his net-work! π·οΈ
- What animal is always at a baseball game? A bat! π¦
- Why don't tigers eat clowns? Because they taste funny! π―
- What do you call a dinosaur that crashes every Lego build? A Tyranno-smash-us Rex! π¦
- What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator! π
- Why do gorillas have big nostrils? Because they have big fingers! π¦
- What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear! π»
- What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk! π
- Why did Bluey bring a ladder to school? She wanted to go to high school! πΎ
- What's a dog's favorite kind of pizza? Pup-peroni! π
- Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 ate (8) 9! π’
- What did zero say to eight? Nice belt! π
- Why was the math book sad? It had too many problems! π
- What do you call a horse that lives next door? A neigh-bor! π
- Why did the pony get sent to his room? He wouldn't stop horsing around! π΄
- What do you call a horse that lives in Mongolia and loves jokes? A neigh-bor of the steppe! ππΏ
- Why don't fish play basketball? They're afraid of the net! π
- What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved! π
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